Eight years ago today my mom passed away.

My mom was truly one of the nicest and most compassionate people you’d ever meet. She was tough as nails and always stood up for what she believed in, and never once hesitated to get involved when she witnessed injustice.  Her heart was big enough for everyone and she often defended the underdog, putting everyone else’s needs before her own. Nothing was too much of a bother for her and she would go to the ends degree to make everyone feel loved.

My mom loved to travel and every new place she visited brought her nothing but joy and excitement. She was literally like that proverbial “kid in the candy store” in foreign countries, but she especially liked America and was always more than happy to visit us. And of course everything was so much better here than it was in Germany. She liked the sun, beach, and the outdoors in general as much as I do and although she was not a runner she was an avid walker and in constant motion. Sitting around was never her thing, something she definitely passed on to me.

Being that I was my mom’s only child she undoubtedly doted on me, especially since she had been waiting for my arrival for nine years. I can say with all honesty that I was never spoiled (my dad is an only child as well and knew just how to handle me!) but I definitely enjoyed my mom’s full attention.  The thing I appreciated the most about my mom was the fact that she never ever tried to be my best friend. She was my mom and never ventured beyond her role as such.

Since we were mother and daughter we definitely had our fair share of conflict and head budding. Not surprisingly the moments of disharmony gained full momentum during my teenage years, years that are speckled with disagreements and the occasional shouting match. Deep down we knew that we loved each other even if we did not see eye to eye on a lot of things, and that was more than enough to make it through to my adult hood. I am sure that my mom would have loved nothing more than for me to live close by once I moved out, but instead, she fully supported my decision to go abroad. My plan to move to the States must have torn on her soul but she never once let it show, not even shedding a single tear at the airport on the day of my departure. All she wanted was for me to be happy and explore new opportunities and it was more than enough for her to find happiness as well. Her daughter had grown up and she felt she had done everything she could to raise me into a young woman that could make it in the world away from home.

The last time I had seen my mom before I rushed to her bedside was a year before when David and I took the kids on a trip to Europe to visit Nain and Tied in North Wales and then fly down to Austria to spent the remaining vacation on a working farm. My parents came and spent the week with us and although I had seen my mom just a month before when they stayed with us in Santa Barbara she had already started to feel unwell and not herself.

My mother had suffered from stomach ailments all of her life and therefore took the subtle warning signs in the beginning not serious enough. It also did not help that she never really took any ailment serious enough, but was more or less a martyr when it came to sickness and injury. When I was in 2nd Grade I fell off of a climbing structure at school while hanging upside down from my knees and knocked myself out. After I came to in the playground the teacher decided it was a good idea to send me home on foot! (Don’t ask! It was Germany where things worked differently!) I am amazed she actually went so far as to excuse one of my friends so she could accompany me on my way home. I felt dizzy, but hey, I made it. When I rang the doorbell at an unannounced time my mom asked why I was home already and I explained that I had fallen. “But you fall every day, why would you come home?”, was her reaction until I showed her the damage to the left side of my face which was marked by scrapes and bruising. She had me go lie down and told me that by morning it was all going to be forgotten. I threw up all over her shoes. That’s when my grandpa got involved and suggested that taking me to the ER might be a good idea. Turns out I not only had a concussion and skull contusion, I had also broken my left temple bone. Ten days of inpatient intermediate care  followed.

So it was no surprise that my mom did not take her own emerging illness as serious as she should have. Not only did she keep how she felt to herself, when it finally became clear to my dad that she was not well she made him swear not to reveal the details and extend to me over the phone. Until the following spring, she never once mentioned anything to me even though we talked every couple of weeks. I had a feeling something was awry but even when I pushed I got nothing more than the usual “It’s just temporary and I will be fine!”. My mom trusted her doctor, a GI specialist who always kept up with the latest research and therefore never went for a second opinion until it was too late.  Even after the newest meds he put her on did nothing and her pain became increasingly unbearable did she not seek another consultation from a different specialist. When my dad finally told me that she had lost nearly 30 pounds I immediately knew that the situation was serious if not grave and made it my mission to get her to switch doctors. She eventually did. She was in hospital for the next eight weeks and never got better. When my dad called to tell me that the doctors had relayed to him that she would not recover I flew back to Germany and spent the last three days with her. Seeing a loved one die is never easy but bearing witness to someone dying from advanced and metastasized stomach cancer is probably as bad as it gets. Walking into her room and seeing her withered down to a mere 60 pounds was almost more than even I could handle and it took all of my resolve to keep it together. When she passed away in her sleep three days later it was truly a relief for her as well as her family and I was thankful that I had the opportunity to be there for her during her last few days.

It is hard to believe that eight years have gone by since that day. Since I did not see my mom on a regular basis her death did not hit me at first, I was only glad that she did not have to suffer any longer. It was the moment my dad stepped off the plane in Santa Barbara the following Christmas – alone, that I realized I would never see her again. And I miss her, even today. I miss not being able to just pick up the phone and talk to her. I miss her enthusiasm for life, her love for food (something she did not pass on to me at all!), her excitement about the little things in life. I miss seeing her with my dad and the way she adored David. I even miss our disagreements! I miss her being my mom!

And I will never forget her!

Today’s Running Tip: There will be no tip today!

Did you just hear that? That was me breathing in deeply before elaborating on my experience with Yoga.

Kitzzy made the following statement and asked questions about Yoga in the Runners’ Lounge this morning:

“I find yoga to be an excellent companion to my running to avoid injury, improve flexibility, and help relieve sore muscles after a
hard workout or race. Tell us about your experience with yoga as it relates to running. If you have not tried it, why not? If you have,
did it help? How often do you feature yoga in your weekly workout regime? What are your favorite yoga poses and routines? Pass on your
recommendations for your favorite yoga DVDs, instructors, podcasts, online resources, etc.”

I had my first experience with Yoga 2 1/2 years ago. At the time I was training for the San Diego Rock ‘N’ Roll Marathon and used the gym I belong to for speed workouts on the treadmill, weights, and cross training on the stationary bike once the weather got warm that spring (we were still living in Santa Barbara every other week and I had yet to run in 110 degree temperatures).  The previous fall I had also started to take a couple of afternoon Pilates classes that the gym offered and although I enjoyed them I never really fell for the whole Pilates craze that was running rampant at the time. And then the gym started to offer a Yoga class on Saturday mornings! They already had a few Yoga classes on schedule for weekday mornings but since nothing will get in between me and my running shorts on weekday mornings I always passed up the opportunity.

During that particular training season I started to do my long runs on Fridays in order to leave the entire weekend open for play. A Yoga class on Saturday mornings was going to fit my schedule just perfectly. And thus it began!

Yoga had always been something I wanted to try and it did not disappoint. I was hooked immediately! For the first time in my life I had found something that calmed down my brain besides running. Chelsea, who taught the class is one die hard Yogi who can pull off a pose like this without batting an eyelash:

I would be lying if I said that first class was not challenging. But I liked the challenge. Whereas in Pilates I had hardly broken a sweat ever, after my first Yoga class I felt thoroughly worked out. For a long distance runner that’s an achievement! One I embraced and stuck with for the past 2 1/2 years. And it has remained challenging to this day, which is also a huge bonus. I am not so sure I would have stuck with it if it had gotten easier over time but let’s just say I am glad that it hasn’t. Over the years many members have dropped in and out of this class but a core group of us has remained loyal to ringing in the weekend by breathing in deeply and letting all that stagnant week’s worth of air out slowly. We don’t take ourselves too seriously and often get bewildered looks from the people in the cardio room who can see us through huge windows. Ask us if we care!

Chelsea always focused most on upper body strength, chest and hip openers, and every runner out there knows just how tight hips can actually get. Over time I have definitely seen the difference in my muscle definition, especially in my arms and shoulders, which are much more defined than they used to be. As for my hips. Well, they still scream every time we do our first lunge but by the time I leave they are nice and lose. Until next time.

Now, I do have to admit that not every week is all zen. There are weeks when even in Yoga I cannot quiet my brain and by the time we get to Savasana to finish our practice you can find me counting ceiling tiles, eyes wide open! But since I still get the strength building and stretching exercise in I don’t mind and those wired mornings are few and far between anyway.

About two months ago Chelsea quit (we are not supposed to take it personal, but whatever!) and we now have Madeleine. Who is lovely! And very different than Chelsea and at first I had my doubts. But, alas, I actually realized last Saturday that I actually enjoy Madeleine’s class even more than Chelsea’s. Something I would have shrugged off as impossible a few months ago. Madeleine really focuses on calming the mind, breathing techniques and stretches. And I love it! I now get my strength workout in my S.E.T. Class on Tuesday and Thursday afternoons (formerly the Pilates class, but turns out I was not the only one who felt Pilates was a waste of time!) so the new Yoga class is a well rounded addition to cover all the bases during the week.

Here are a few poses that make Yoga so appealing to me:

~ Ardha Matsyendrasana
~ Marichyasana I
~ Malasana
~ Garudasana
~ Vrksasana
~ Balasana
~ Supta Baddha Konasana

Saturdays have become the only day of the week I do not run and I look forward to hitting the mat every week. Namaste!

Today’s Running Tip: Try Yoga!

“Yoga improves strength and balance, but one of the best things it can do for runners is increase flexibility,” says Bruce Dick, M.D., a partner of Orthopedic Associates of Saratoga in Saratoga Springs, New York, who has been doing sun salutations since the early 1980s, when he needed to improve his flexibility for triathlon training. He still recommends yoga to his patients, especially those who think running a marathon is easier than touching their toes. “If you don’t have the flexibility in your hip flexors and hamstrings to create an adequate range of motion, your body will ask that motion to come from other joints–joints not meant to produce that motion. So you get early fatigue, early breakdown, and you expose yourself to injury.” ~ Source: Runner’s World

Back in June, Lindsey over at Chasing the Kenyans was tagged by one of her friends who asked her to indulge her readers with the details of the spot she blogs from and some other rather random personal info. She invited everyone who follows her to do the same if they so chose. At the time I was not up to it, but today seems to be a good day for such disclosure. Are you holding on to your seats in anticipation? Thought so!

The magic! It all happens right here (dog included!)

From a different perspective!

What are you wearing right now? bikini bottom and a T-Shirt featuring a head shot of Nelson

What’s the last thing you read/are currently reading? Palestine – Peace not Apartheid

Do you nap a lot? frequently! In fact I try to nap every afternoon. When I worked in an office I used to go home for lunch to power nap

Who was the last person you hugged? David

What’s your current obsession/addiction? green iced tea lemonades

What was the last thing you bought? green iced tea lemonade

What are you listening to right now? the pool fountain splashing away

If you could have a superpower what would it be? teleport anywhere I wanted to be at any given time

What time do you usually wake up? right now around 5am (and I don’t even need an alarm)

Name one thing you can’t live without? David

What time is bed time? between 11pm and 12 am

If there was one place you could be right now where would it be? Venice

Today’s Running Tip: Try to take naps!

Naps are a great way to give your body an extra chance to recover between workouts, especially for people who are doing a lot of very intense training or working out multiple times per day. The sleep between the workouts helps calm and recover the body, before working out again.

“You get to run the last six miles of your next marathon with 6 different people.

They can be dead or alive; famous or not famous.  Who are these people and why did you pick them?  Furthermore, why did you pick them for the specific mile you did?  Remember, you get an extra .2miles with runner #6.”*

This is definitely by far the most interesting question that has been posted in the Runner’s Lounge to date. And thanks to Jillian I have been racking my brain over dreaming about this opportunity. Just imagine how great that would be if you could choose anyone to run with when you are most vulnerable and as disgusting as you can possible get in a marathon.  It has been said that most runners hit “The Wall” between miles 18 and 20 so this might not be the best mile where you want Brad Pitt to join your efforts. I am not sure about you but I would want to look my possibly best if ever I had the delightful chance. I am sure Brad has seen his fair share of snot, drool, sweat and tears with his ever expanding brood but come on, smelling like a dead goat probably won’t lead to a good first impression. Which leads me to believe that I would toss all of my fantasies aside and choose some hardened running buddies to help me through miles 20-21, 21-22, and 22-23.

Given the fact that I usually break all the rules that have been bestowed on us runners and actually hit my wall between mile 20 and 23 I would want some buddies of mine, who know a thing or two about getting through the rough spots, to join me in my misery.

At mile 20 I would like to see Ana! I know that I will be banging my knees against that proverbial wall soon enough and need someone who can pick up the pace for me as I try my hardest not to slow down to snail’s pace in anticipation. She is one of the strongest runners I know and has motivated me on countless runs to push myself beyond my comfort zone.

At mile 21 I want Sierra to join me! Sierra is the tiniest and toughest person I know. If she weighs 90 pounds wet I’d be surprised. But get her out on the open road and she will kick your sorry ass (she actually did kick my shins ones on our last training run but I am brushing it off as an unfortunate coincidence). I met Sierra while I was training for my last marathon and we basically ran the entire training season together. She single handedly pushed me to another level, a level where I finally ran negative splits again after a long period of being stuck in a rut. Having her as company from mile 21 and 22 when I am climbing the wall would assure that I could scale it.

Mile 22! By now I should be on the other side of “The Wall” and trying to get back into my pace. Who better to help me do so than my good friend Jeff! Jeff is not only one of the nicest people you ever meet, not to mention good looking (and single! Ladies!!!), but he is an incredible runner who could easily run a sub 3 hour marathon but always chooses to help out his team mates instead. When I was crashing in San Diego due to cramps he was there, right when I needed him most, at mile 22! Since I had lost all peripheral vision at that point all I could do was focus on Jeff’s leg turn over as he ran in front of me for three miles to get me back into my pace.

And at mile 23 I should be all back into a rhythm and ready for the home stretch. So come on out famous people! I even washed away the dried spit at the last water stop. Don’t mind the salt rings on my shirt or the stickiness on my skin. It’s only old, dried Gatorade mixed with hard earned sweat. Since this is the beginning of the home stretch I would want to have a runner with me who can kick it up a notch for me. Who better than this girl:

Because, if I can make good time from mile 24 to 25 I could then hang out with this guy for a while 7 1/2 to 8 minutes and have a little chat about endurance and what I have just been through. And if he is not someone who is inspiring in regards to endurance then I don’t know who is. It also does not hurt that this guy is a total Hottie! Man oh man, one can only dream!

And then the dream could just continue to the ultimate reward, were at mile 25 a man would join my race that has moved millions and motivated more people than ever before to get involved in the political process of this country. Of course it also does not hurt that this man has Kenyan blood flowing through his veins, and even though he specializes in basket ball I just know he can bring it on the running circuit as well. I choose President Barack Obama as the person I would want to finish my marathon with as it would allow me to spend .2 miles more with him than all the others and if anyone is worth that extra time it is him. Who better equipped for the final home stretch than the man whose odds were all against him to become the leader of the free world? A man who has always shown perseverance and an almost uncanny ability to bring his message home in the end. With him by my side my last 1.2 miles can only be a successful home run:

Just look at that stride!!!

* this is the runner's world equivalent to "Five people in a hot tub"... just sayin'

Today’s Running Tip: Running through “The Wall”!

No matter how many pounds of pasta you eat for your pre race dinner, our bodies can only store about 1600 to 1800 calories of energy in the form of glycogen in the liver and muscles and at approximately 100 calories per mile. Come mile 20 you are out of reserves! Therefore it is important that you refuel throughout the marathon with carbohydrate rich snacks: sport gels, pretzels, jelly beans, etc. All are good if you have experimented with them during training. Don’t try anything new on race day!

1. Barack Obama

2. that summer is hanging on

3. walks at dusk

4. my Oldies at the gym, even if they drive me batty sometime

5. Jon Stewart