A few weeks ago I wrote about my judgmental self and mentioned that fact that I am an only child. There are a lot of writings, rumors, and especially opinions out there about only children. “Spoiled brats”, “always get what they want”, “princes and princesses”, “selfish” are only a few that come to mind. And this might certainly be true for some, but there are also a lot of children out there who have siblings and fall into the mentioned categories. One only has to watch the train wreck that is “My Super Sweet 16″ to realize that only children are certainly not the only ones who don’t like to share, or display anti social behavior at its finest. 

As I said back then, I am an extremely social person. And I blame my social being on my growing up as an only child, an only grandchild, and an only niece. Did you manage to keep track? Cause it’s a lot to swallow. My family is a small one. My dad is an only child as well. My mom had one sister who had no children. In my childhood universe there were no siblings to squabble with, no cousins to play with on holidays and family visits. What does an only child do? They really have no choice but to make friends and then work on getting along with these friends, because unlike siblings, who are forced to live with you no matter what, friends can choose to disappear from your life if you take their toy away. At least this was what happened in my life. I was never shy (which is another stereotype only children get brand-marked with as if there are no shy children to be found that have siblings) so for me my social life has always been one of the most important aspects of my life, even at the tender age of 4 when I started pre school and when I can recall my first memories. And to this day my friendships and my social life are one of the most important, if not the most important, aspect of my life. 

Personally, my reality was far from that of a spoiled brat. In fact I cannot remember one single instant when I got a present for Christmas or my birthday that was EXACTLY what I wanted, mostly I got what my mom wanted for me to have. And unlike mine, blue was not her favorite color, neither did she share my love for everything that is striped or polka dotted… I know, tragic! You tell me!!!

Yes, I never had to fight with siblings over my parents’ and grandparents’ attention but to say I had the undivided attention of my family is a far fetched notion. The fact that my mom was a Stay-at-Home-Mother would make you think that she had a lot of time to spend with and on me. But it would deflect from the fact that she had her daily and weekly routine nailed down to the last minute, a routine that did not necessarily involve her daughter. There was a reason why her hair always looked fabulously immaculate. And if I got sick it just never seemed to fit in with her schedule, but it also never inconvenienced her either. Since my grandparents lived in the same house she was mostly free to follow her weekly callings. But then there were those three months every year when grandpa and grandma took off to sunny Spain to escape the traitorous German winter. Every January they flew to the country of citrus fruits and paella and did not return until early April. And every year in February I came down with a horrendous case of strep throat, leaving my mother no choice but to tuck me into bed at home while she stayed on schedule. This meant that from a tender age of six I was basically left home alone while my mom did all those things that needed to be doing outside the house. This was before cable TV was even a thought and the three channels we could choose from did not air programming during the day (this is what some might refer to as the “good old days”! And yes, they SUCKED!!! No wonder I am addicted to it now). I did a lot of reading in those days (something that has not changed), usually all bundled up in bed with the front door locked tight (just in case I wanted to take a walk with a fever of 102 and a sore throat that left me unable to swallow anything but ice cubes). This was also the time before cell phones were even a figment of someone’s imagination so I never had any way of reaching my mom while she was out and about. Hours would go by, books would be finished, boredom would set in. In the end I usually picked up the land line phone (remember those) and called my aunt or one of my mom’s friends, or random neighbors whose phone number I looked up in the phone book (and to this day I have no issues talking to strangers). Now in this country, in this day and age, my mother would have been charged with child abandonment, no doubt. I cannot even imagine. But this was in Germany in the 70s and no one even considered that this was something to worry about. I don’t think it ever once crossed my mom’s mind that she was doing anything unusual or that she was leaving me in harms way. For her, leaving me home while I was sick, was just something that needed to be done while she went about her days. Just as long as the front door was locked, all windows closed, what could possibly go wrong? And I must say, I actually never resented her for it or thought of it as a strange thing to do to a child. It was just the way things were in our family. That is, until I came to this country and the thought of leaving a 6 year old home alone only provokes images of the movie by the same title. Only worse! And without the happy ending! Of course I had also enjoyed a very healthy dose of constant discipline from an early age on (I could properly eat with a knife and fork when I turned 2), something this country’s youth lacks in more ways than one, and the thought of misbehaving while home alone never once crossed my mind.

But it sure would have been nice to have siblings to fight with while my mom was gone. The misbehaving we could have accomplished is beyond anything I can imagine as an only child!

Today’s Running Tip: Running while sick!

Should you continue to run when you are not feeling well. If you have a cold a good rule of thumb is that if you only feel it from the neck up you are fine to go out for an easy run. If you feel aches and pains from the neck down, and/or have a fever you should take a break, rest, and let your body recover.